Criteria for joining the Nacho Average Triathlon Team

The following are mandatory criteria for potential recruits who are interested in being a part of this historical, elite group of athletes. Potential team members MUST meet all of the requirements, and are subject to review by existing Team Members.

Just because you meet all of the requirements, doesn't mean you will make the team. Remember this is a select group of athletes.

1. Be able to race and perform at an "elite" level, while maintaining the ability to consume INHUMAN amounts of Nachos, Mozza Sticks, Coffee, and Beer.

2. Must have sufficient funds to purchase above necessities for senior team members.

3. Must be gainfully employed, or come from old money, in order to meet requirement #2.

4. Must be willing to train and race in authorized, licensed team apparel, including VERY LARGE sombreros (available at www.pstrysport.com).

5. Must be willing to apply "Body Glide", "Chamois Butter", or other similar anti-friction products to Senior Team members.

6. Must be willing/able to have "balls busted" on a regular basis, and be able to "bust balls" at an elite level.

7. The ability to attend post-race parties/pub-crawls, and create said parties if none is available.

8. Must be able to tolerate long road trips while listening to only one CD, and/or Senior Team members reminiscence.


Send applications to david@pstrysport.com, subject: BODYGLIDE


Thank You, and good luck!